monkey crack

 

Archives
Sept. '02
May '02
April '02
March '02
Feb. '02
Jan. '02
Nov. '01
Oct. '01
Sept. '01
Aug. '01
July '01
June '01
May '01
April '01
March '01

LiveJournal
BBoard

Home

This page is powered by Blogger, the easy way to update your web site. Comment script provided by remotedotcomments. PHP hosting provided by Freaky.nu - ad-free blog and journal hosting.

   
Do you, for some ungodly reason, want to link to this site? Well, cool! Just save & upload a graphic to your server and link it to http://www.astrumignis.com/monkey


monday, june 25

How I've Wasted a Month of My Life

Some people are just frelling ungrateful. I mean, us seasonal workers bust our arses to get through their backlog of work and what do we get? Whispers behind our backs. Hey, sure, we're working for the GED office -- in contact with a lot of very sensitive paperwork -- but do you think we're gonna steal it or something? Please. If I were to steal something, it would not be GED test scores, okay?

Anyone from that office reading this: Don't take this the wrong way. GED processing is important. ::nods:: A lot of the people who work there are really cool. Some of them aren't. Some of them are down right ungrateful pieces of dren who, if they have something to say to us, should say it to our face. Frell, I'm gonna lay it out here.

Last week, one of us had a friend visit -- as she does every morning -- but that afternoon, one of the permanent members had the balls to complain that "she doesn't even work here." First, why don't you say it out loud. Second, don't whisper it to one of the other (cool) employees when the other seasonal is right next to you, dumb ass. You think we wouldn't tell each other? Please, it's not like you're my boss.

And today... well, today one of them had the nerve to say (not to the offending party, of course) that we were at it again (playing with the computer) even though ..um.. the lady in charge.. had said something about it during a meeting Friday. See, we get these things called "breaks" and I've only taken one 15 min break the entire 3 weeks I've worked here, so I don't want to hear it. I do my work. Pardon me if I take two minutes of my time to help someone on the computer. Okay, so it was with what I'm gonna call a "humorous" webpage and not at all work related, but so what? ::rolls eyes:: Sometimes I need to take a sanity break from this monotonous, humorless, hair-brained operation.

And that's just how it is. What are you gonna do... fire me? Mwahahahaha! Like I would care. *nefarious grin*
posted on 6/25/2001 04:59:42 PM
.. l.i.n.k.i.t


saturday, june 23

Saw this last night, but haven't had a chance to get online and rant about it yet, so excuse me if my memory isn't too sharp.

SPOILERS FOR FARSCAPE SEASON 3: "GREEN EYED MONSTER"
*
*
*
*

Hot damn! Ben Browder writes a mean eppy. And can I say that it's a very good thing that Ben is such a 'shipper, 'cause this was the 'shippiest episode of 'em all! ((Sez might tell me different...))

Although, this whole two Crichtons thing is really confusing... and now there's really two crews. Crichton, Chiana, Dargo, and Jool on Moya with Pilot. Crichton, Aeryn, Rygel, Stark on Talyn with Crais. Scary. This was focused on the second group (obviously) and in the beginning it seems as if Crais is trying to sabotage the whole John/Aeryn dynamic. First, DRDs are kept working over John's head when he's trying to sleep, then Wynonna goes missing. This is a big no-no. No one touches Wynonna *cheeky grin* The last straw for poor Crichton is when Crais (it seems) calls John to his quaters. There's a vid chip on the table, containing some, er, personal files on Aeryn... including a final sequence with Aeryn and Crais getting horizontal. *SPEW!!!* Crichton spends the rest of the episode being his classically P.O.ed self, with snarky comments and a bad attitude.

Oh, did I mention that they were swallowed by a Budong? Yeah. And Stark & Rygel were stuck in a transport pod trying to figure out how to get Talyn out of the Budong. Crais's idea was to "fly through the ass," as Crichton put it. LOL Eventually they came up with a plan to have the Budong puke 'em out. Ew..

Back to the 'shippiness... Aeryn agrees to take the neural transponder and link with Talyn and Crais. John & Aeryn have a fight.. Aeryn takes the implant anyway. Turns out that Crais was having trouble controlling Talyn because of some kind of mental bleed-back. And Talyn was the one who was trying to get John away from Aeryn because Talyn sees him as a threat to her. Sweet, but very wrong. Especially when Talyn arranges to have Crichton SPACED. *argh* Frelling gunship. Of course, Crais was the one who was blocking the fact that John was really stuck out in space. "Peacekeeper lies." Aeryn uses her link with Talyn to show him that John isn't a threat to her; that she needs him.

Aeryn to Talyn: "Do you feel that? Good. That's what it's like to need someone." Then she tells him that he'll never need her or something like that. She rips the neural thingy out and demands that Talyn open the door... before the fuel outside explodes (so they get vomited out by the Budong) and Crichton turns into a cruton *g* Surprisingly, Talyn lets him in at the last second.

I did find the end scene a little too saccarine. The naming the stars bit, I mean. Um.. where the frell did John get paper and a pen from? The part where they're having the really emotional talk about John being a plague to Aeryn -- killing her Peacekeeper ideals and upbringing -- that was great.

Some poster on the Farscape Bboard mentioned that the Crichton on Moya changed to a new green shirt and the Crichton on Talyn was still in the old Peacekeeper outfit. Now, keeping in mind the history of Crichton's clothing chages and all... some people are thinking that GreenShirt!Crichton will pursue the whole wormhole-Scorpius thing while PeacekeeperOutfit!Crichton will pursue Aeryn. This could be a very good thing, but I wonder... does this mean double-duty for Ben Browder or half-time from the rest of the cast?

Someone there also mentioned some in-jokes for fans.. to which I say, "huh"? I'm not really that in-touch with the 'Scapers, so I have no idea to what this refers. Anyone wanna clue me in?

*
*
*
*
END SPOILERS FOR "GREEN EYED MONSTER"

On another note... Eberts said "frell" on Friday's eppy of The Invisible Man, "Going Postal." Here's part of what Michael "Eberts" McCafferty posted at the I-Man BBoard:

"So hereís the farscape tie-in. I love when shows can reference each other; it really broadens the reality of both projects. I had decided a while back that it would be fun to acknowledge a sci-fi channel show. I really like Farscape (itís on as I type) and decided that Iíd throwing in a "Frell" somewhere as itís easy enough to imply that Eberts watches Farscape in the evenings and soaps in the days. Normal scripts didnít usually warrant that line (ĎHereís those Frelling file, sir!í) so I waited until this script. I figured that even if TPTB didnít want Eberts to watch the show, heís nuts at the time so anything that came out of his mouth didnít have to make sense. With that in mind, I made sure to say it when I had a chance.
Except I forgot!
I realized as I wrapped the scenes that I had forgotten to stick the line in there! I was devastated! I went home a pouted. About 4 weeks ago, we had to Ďloopí lines for the episode. Basically, they needed grunts (for when I hit the agent with a garbage can.) a line off camera and some filler dialogue for getting the bag put on me! I knew this was my big chance. I recorded the line and then took pains to explain to Paul Leonard, our associate producer and man of all effects why I said it and why they should do everything to keep it in there. To my surprise they did! I hope the Ďscapers donít take offense as it was pure homage."

Seems like he posts weekly with a behind-the-scenes report of the eppy. How very cool of him ^_^
posted on 6/23/2001 08:51:02 PM
.. l.i.n.k.i.t


saturday, june 16

Just a bit of fun that my friend Sez sent to me a while back. Dedicated to anyone who's ever worked in system support or a help desk of any kind.

How to Please Your I.T. Department

1. When you call us to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of postcards, baby pictures, stuffed animals, dried flowers, bowling trophies and children's art. We don't have a life, and we find it deeply moving to catch a fleeting glimpse of yours.

2. Don't write anything down. Ever. We can play back the error messages from here.

3. When an I.T. person says he's coming right over, go for coffee. That way you won't be there when we need your password. It's nothing for us to remember 700 screen saver passwords.

4. When you call the help desk, state what you want, not what's keeping you from getting it. We don't need to know that you can't get into your mail because your computer won't power on at all.

5. When I.T. support sends you an E-Mail with high importance, delete it at once. We're just testing.

6. When an I.T. person is eating lunch at his desk, walk right in and spill your guts right out. We exist only to serve.

7. Send urgent email all in uppercase. The mail server picks it up and flags it as a rush delivery.

8. When the photocopier doesn't work, call computer support. There's electronics in it.

9. When you're getting a NO DIAL TONE message at home, call computer support. We can fix your telephone line from here.

10. When you have a dozen old computer screens to get rid of, call computer support. We're collectors.

11. When something's wrong with your home PC, dump it on an I.T. person's chair with no name, no phone number and no description of the problem. We love a puzzle.

12. When an I.T. person tells you that computer screens don't have cartridges in them, argue. We love a good argument.

13. When an I.T. person tells you that he'll be there shortly, reply in a scathing tone of voice: "And just how many weeks do you mean by shortly?" That motivates us.

14. When the printer won't print, re-send the job at least 20 times. Print jobs frequently that get sucked into black holes.

15. When the printer still won't print after 20 tries, send the job to all 68 printers in the company. One of them is bound to work.

16. Don't learn the proper name for anything technical. We know exactly what you mean by "My thingy blew up".

17. Don't use on-line help. On-line help is for wimps.

18. If the mouse cable keeps knocking down the framed picture of your dog, lift the computer and stuff the cable under it. Mouse cables were designed to have 20kg of computer sitting on top of them.

19. If the space bar on your keyboard doesn't work, blame it on the mail upgrade. Keyboards are actually very happy with half a pound of muffin crumbs and nail clippings in them.

20. When you get a message saying "Are you sure?" click on that Yes button as fast as you can. Hell, if you weren't sure, you wouldn't bedoing it, would you?

21. When you find an I.T. person on the phone with his bank, sit uninvited on the corner of his desk and stare at him until he hangs up. We don't have any money to speak of anyway.

22. Feel perfectly free to say things like "I don't know nothing about that computer crap". We don't mind at all hearing our area of professional expertise referred to as crap.

23. When you need to change the toner cartridge in a printer, call I.T. support. Changing a toner cartridge is an extremely complex task, and Hewlett-Packard recommends that it be performed only by a professional engineer with a master's degree in nuclear physics.

24. When something's the matter with your computer, ask your secretary to call the help desk. We enjoy the challenge of having to deal with a third party who doesn't know anything about the problem.

25. When you receive a 30mb (huge) movie file, send it to everyone as a mail attachment. We've got lots of disk space on that mail server.

26. Don't even think of breaking large print jobs down into smaller chunks. Somebody else might get a chance to squeeze a memo into the queue.

27. When you lose your car keys, send an email to the entire company. People out in Pofadder like to keep abreast of what's going on.

28. When you bump into an I.T. person at the grocery store on a Saturday, ask a computer question. We do weekends.

29. Don't bother to tell us when you move computers around on your own. Computer names are just a cosmetic feature.

30. When you bring your own personal home PC for repair at the office, leave the documentation at home. We'll find all the settings and drivers somewhere.

31. Keep it crashing!
posted on 6/16/2001 10:41:25 AM
.. l.i.n.k.i.t


Monkey Crack is an AstrumIgnis Production.
Maintained by Amezri. This is totally over-opinionated. So pardon if Ah offend.